Tag: Divine

The 4th Pillar: Explore [Your] Divinity (Pt 3- Divine Character)

Connecting with Spirit doesn’t have to be complicated or convoluted. It can absolutely be as simple and pleasant as having a conversation with someone you are fond of.

Prayer becomes talking to your wisest, most caring friend. Meditation becomes listening to the songs of the trees and the stars. Worship becomes honoring the earth and the water and the sky. Enlightenment becomes falling in Love with the Truth of your own Highest Self, and recognizing the Highest Self within those around you.

Remember Love, though you may be talking with a Divine Being, you are also a Divine Being. The only difference is that at least one of you is currently existing in a human body.

traditional tibetan candle holders placed on table
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By actively exploring the essence and qualities of Divinity and cultivating our connection to all things spiritually- including nature, community, and self– we develop a profound sense of mutual caring, respect for, and recognition of the wholeness of life.

When we begin to consider the traits which define the Divine, we first look to the archetypal characters found in the sacred texts, literature, and folklore. Our most ancient ancestors created and passed down stories of gods, goddesses, and the ascended masters to help learn and teach about the world around them as well as the emotions within them. We still hold these up as the perfect models that we aspire to.

To begin to recognize this Divine essence, let’s look at what are considered some of the most positive or pleasant characteristics attributed to Divinity. A few examples:

Sacred, Holy, Eternal, Truth, Blessings, Transcendence, Love, Joy, Peace, Creativity, Beauty, Goodness, Abundance, Generosity, Justice, Liberation, Freedom, Healing, Compassion, Kindness, Grace, Power, Sovereignty, Wisdom.

This is a brief, not an exhaustive list of many of the Ideals (standards) and Values (drivers) that we tend to assign to spiritual beings and deities across world religions and faith communities. Often these are Values that we also either look for in, or erroneously assign to, people in positions of power, governance & leadership, and Ideals that we individually strive to hold ourselves to.  

reflection from glass on black background
Photo by Maria Orlova on Pexels.com

So what about the characteristics that have become vilified? What do we do with the so-called negative or “low-vibe” emotions of Anger, Vengeance, Sadness, Jealousy, Fear, Hatred? Though they may be uncomfortable to handle, they are no less Divine than any other feeling. These are just as real, just as powerful, and just as necessary for understanding our experience in this life.

One of the biggest frustrations I have with so many spiritual communities is the phenomenon of “toxic positivity” that is alarmingly prevalent and ever-present. Toxic positivity is what I call the tactic of bypassing our more challenging, difficult, uncomfortable, or otherwise highly-charged emotions. Feelings like Anger, Vengeance, Sadness, Jealousy, Fear, or even Hatred have become vilified and labeled as negative or low-vibe, when all they actually are natural, normal, very human and indeed part of the myriad characteristics also found in the Divine.

Instead of learning what these powerful feelings are, why they show up, and how we can work with them to create positive change and transformation, we are taught all sorts of “mindset hacks” to avoid experiencing and expressing these emotions. This is not healthy and it’s not in alignment with reality.

It’s reductive and dismissive at best, and what’s worse is that we are shamed into believing that we are wrong or bad or broken for having these feelings, and we’re not spiritual or holy enough because we haven’t “transcended negative emotions” like a proper guru or one of the ascended masters.

The problem is that’s total Bullshit.

Expressing Anger doesn’t make you less spiritual. Wanting Vengeance doesn’t make you less holy. Neither does feeling Sadness, experiencing Jealousy, carrying Fear, or holding Hatred make you any less spiritual, holy, human, or Divine. All of these are real, they are normal, and they have just as important a purpose for us in our spiritual journey as do the light, bright, easy, lovely emotions.

Our work is to learn why we feel them, what triggers them in us, what messages they hold for us, and how we can work with them for our Highest Good without being shitty to others. There is beautiful, powerful healing available to us when we are willing to dive into this.

asphalt dark dawn endless
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Over the past week, I had the privilege of visiting a beautiful, healing retreat in the Arizona desert. This spa/resort held a Divine spirit that was palpable; so peaceful, so immense, so transformative. The majority of people there (of the few that were allowed to visit due to COVID restrictions) were totally blissed out, and without exception all of the guides that we encountered had a calm, positive presence about them that told of extraordinary journeys and lives deeply healed. 

Most everyone that we interacted with commented on my “positive energy” or my “great attitude” and stuff like that. And it’s true, I definitely shared the best of myself whenever possible. But what most people didn’t see, and most people didn’t witness, were the parts of me that I typically only share in the safest, most controlled spaces.

Only a small handful of folx got to see me cry, cuss, and use all of my mindset tools. Only a few were there to witness me push through my fear and physical limitations before I tapped out. Only my husband could hold me close and love me in my messiest places of Anger, Hatred, Fear, Frustration, Jealousy, and Sadness as I moved through them to find Calm, Clarity, and Healing. 

And that is the whole point of Transformational Positivity. In opening ourselves to experience challenges and allowing ourselves to explore the more difficult emotions as they come up, instead of pushing them away or stuffing them back down deep inside of us, we can begin to view old patterns in a new light, untangle ourselves from old stories, and move forward with a more empowered, clear, and healthy vision for our life.

We experienced some powerful mindset shifting, and some personal transformations of our own this past week. It was a spiritual experience that had nothing to do with religion, and everything to do with connecting to the Highest Power within, and seeing same spirit moving through everyone and everything around us, as much as they chose to open to it.

A Moment of Truth

Want a peek behind the veil?

Today I had a moment of clarity that froze me in my tracks. My cousin Nicole and I were in the midst of recording an episode for our podcast, and something we were talking about triggered a powerful message.

I went blank as the divine download was coming in, and couldn’t speak in the moment. I held on, breathed through it, and waited until I could continue our conversation.

It was deep, y’all!

I knew I would need some time to process what was happening inside me, and gave myself the immediate space I needed. I checked in, and found resonance. It took a hot minute, but I faced the thing inside my belly that was ugly & shameful: an old story of unworthiness & a need to be rescued- and met it with love & grace.

I have found that on this road of healing, the most beautiful moment is when we finally discover the Truth: We came into this world as already worthy, not as something flawed and broken.

We are just making our way back to that space of perfect knowing, that place of reverence, awe & acceptance, while discovering the magic along the way. We step in shit, we get messy, we peel away layers of the old stories and lies until we get back to the truth, the light, the love. THAT is the journey.

Whenever I can pause and see how far I have come, I am grateful. There is still a long way to go, and I love each new day I’m given to keep exploring this life.

PS- I’m not entirely sure how this will manifest- maybe as a video series, book, workshop or course- but it looks like I have some more work to do around forgiveness and making amends. Hit reply or join my email newsletter list and let me know if this is something that you would be interested in learning more about.

#theblessingsbutterfly #empowermentcoach #healing #inspirationalquotes #affirmation

How I Became The Blessings Butterfly, Pt. 3: Finding My Purpose

the blessings butterfly

How My Most Desperate Prayer Was Answered

When I had finally reached my true rock bottom, I had reached a place of complete and total surrender.  At the young age of 29, I just wanted everything to end. I was done with life and the mess I had made of it seemed impossible to redeem.

There, in my most broken moment, God/Spirit/My Higher Power answered my most desperate prayer to “take my life and recycle my soul.”

When my childhood friend Robert called my parents’ house late that night, he had no idea what I was about to do. He had no idea that I had just swallowed a handful of pills and was on my way out the door to die quietly, out of sight.  He didn’t know that somehow, miraculously, the God that he had come to have faith in was going to use him to save me that night.  But that’s exactly what happened.

 

Catalina Island + Jesus Freaks

A few days later, instead of being dead, I would be off on a boat to Catalina Island for a camping trip with a group of college-aged men and women who also happened to be a bunch of total Jesus Freaks (I say that in love!), and their leader, my friend Robert. Robert, the squirrelly boy who grew up across the street from me. Robert, who had found a higher calling and become a youth pastor at a local church.  Robert, who unknowingly saved my damn life with one phone call.

It wasn’t my first experience with church, or camp, or church-camp. I had attended Sunday School and mid-week Bible studies, retreats, and the like throughout my childhood and high school, so the concept wasn’t new to me. I had already heard all the Bible stories and I had gone forward about a million times during peer-pressure soaked alter calls. Hell, I had even been baptized and “born again” a few times.  This time, however, something (everything?) was different.

There wasn’t any kind of emotional formula or scare tactics involved, no pressure to “come forward and accept JESUS” or anything like that.  Nobody carrying giant yellow signs telling me that I was going to Hell.  Actually, the people I met on that trip were just… nice. And they were so genuine.  You know that saying, “Sweating like a whore in church?”  These people weren’t about trying to judge me, and they weren’t trying to get in my pants.  It was just nice, and normal, and casual, and dare I say- it was fun.  It was peaceful.  And the most significant difference is that there was just a presence this time that I had never quite understood before, and I began for the first time in my life to experience a sense of deep, deep love in my soul that this presence was somehow tapping into and calling to life.

I know, I know.  It sounds crazy-pants. 

No, I was not high.

Yes, it kinda freaked me out… but I decided eh, what the hell, I’m just going to go ahead and see what this is all about.  And I am so grateful that I did!

It was on that camping trip that I began to discover that what I understood as God- however you may understand this divine presence– is beautifully real, and exists within every living thing.  And holy crap, for the first time ever, I could actually feel this divine presence living in me.  Me!

 

Seeking the Divine & Skipping Church

I would spend the next 15+ years seeking after the Divine and going through some intense and powerful emotional healing.  I began dealing with the many scars and fears I harbored inside myself, slowly and very deliberately allowing Divine Love to bring all of my funky junk to the surface, without fear or judgment or shame.  I learned how to soften, and I learned how to forgive.  I learned what it meant to be blessed, and express gratitude.  To see beauty all around me.  To see goodness in people, and in myself, again.  I learned about strength and trust and hope and joy.  And although I would still make plenty of mistakes along the way, I didn’t have to run away anymore.  I didn’t have to hide anymore.  I could just do the work, and find a new purpose for my life.

I don’t “go to church” anymore, and that’s perfectly fine for me. I consider the whole world as a sacred place, and I consider my ministry or my purpose to extend far beyond any man-made walls or theological boundaries. I like to think of those years of healing as my own personal cocoon where I was being infused with Divine Love in every part of my being, and I was slowly transforming into someone completely new, and dramatically different, and impossibly free. Maybe, if this divine presence could exist in someone like me, I could have the chance for a do-over.  Maybe I wasn’t beyond repair after all.  Maybe, I could begin to pick up the pieces of my broken shit-show life and start to make something useful, something helpful, something beautiful out of it.  I’ll take a Maybe any day, because Maybe = Hope, and Hope = Everything.

 

The Blessings Butterfly today!
The Blessings Butterfly today!

 

Click here if you missed Part 1 or Part 2