Category: inspiration

Lean Into Your Weird

giraffe leaning over fence to kiss blonde middle aged woman

What’s one of the weirdest things about you? What makes you unique, special, gifted? Since I started to embrace and lean into my weird and share about what makes me different, I have been able to use my gifts to help others and do work that I love, whether it’s intuitive readings or animal energy work or transformational healing.

I am very fortunate to have been gifted with the supremely weird and highly magickal ability to communicate energetically with most animals. To do this, I first survey their body language if available, then connect with the animal’s energy field, and ask if they would like to talk with me or if they have something they wish to share. Think along the lines of a “whisperer” to get the idea. With most domestic animals and pets, I can pick up their thoughts, read their energy, and communicate with them fairly easily, even over a great distance. I always love when I am invited to share a pet’s message with his or her human. You can book an Animal Energy Session with me if you have questions for your beloved pet.

Friends who have traveled with me can vouch for the fact that I can even call some species in their own tongue- dolphins and wolves especially- and have them respond. There was the time in the Virgin Islands when we were in the bay at St. John’s, and I kept sensing dolphins nearby. Our captain said that dolphins aren’t normally in this particular area, but I felt them so I called nonetheless. Moments later, a mama dolphin and her calf appeared not 20 feet from our boat! Sorry, no pics for this one as it happened so quickly!

On a recent trip to Alaska, we visited a private wildlife rescue/sanctuary for animals that have been injured in the wild. They are given care and rehabilitated, but their injuries are such that they wouldn’t survive a reintroduction to the surrounding forests. One of the animal residents is a beautiful wolf. I was invited to call out to her and see if she would respond. I went deep into my bones and called up a howl that told her, “I see you, and I am here with you.” If you would like to watch the video of our call and response, you can do that here: Watch the Video

During this same visit, I was also invited to chat with the local mink, and I was absolutely delighted to be able to connect with moose, caribou, bobcat, wolverine, and a grizzly. Amazing time.

And, in one of the wildest and most dramatic displays of my weird gift ever, a couple of years ago in France I healed a bat who had been attacked by a cat. The little bat appeared on the side of the house in broad daylight, which caught our attention (and that of Lulu the house cat).

small grey striped cat outside on pebbles carrying a small black bat in her mouth
Lulu with little bat in her mouth. Thank you to Hilda for capturing this photo!

The little bat fell from her perch and tumbled down the wall two stories to the ground, and we all collectively gasped in horror as Lulu pounced on the poor little thing and proceeded to carry her with her teeth to where we were sitting in the courtyard. I insisted to Lulu that she drop the bat and leave her alone; Lulu preferred to intimidate and “play” with the poor terrified creature for a few minutes longer before grudgingly obeying me. I can’t be mad at Lulu, she was just doing what cats do. My hosts and colleagues moved back, and I moved in closer, kneeling down and talking softly to the little bat and calming her with my voice. I assured her that she was now safe, and that no further harm would come to her. This lasted for about 20-30 minutes, and it was excruciating to hear her little squeals from the pain and terror she had just experienced. Her breathing slowed, then appeared to stop altogether, but our eyes were still locked together and I could still feel her life-energy. I whispered, “The choice is yours, little one. You can let go now if you want to, or you can get up and fly away.” Moments later, she gasped, turned herself onto her belly, and proceeded to fly away up and over the trees. I was ready to collapse myself, as I had never before held such a powerful healing connection with an animal. Not gonna lie, it kinda freaked me out to realize what I was capable of. The looks on my hosts and colleagues faces? Jaws. Dropped.

I actually injured myself with that healing session because I was physically unprepared for it, and the folx around me didn’t know how to support me during the encounter energetically. I don’t blame them for this, it was a weird as hell experience and quite unexpected for all of us. My back went into painful seizure for the remainder of my trip. I did learn from it though, and should such a need for healing intervention arise again, I will know to ask those around me to hold sacred space for me and the animal.

So, why do I share all of this weirdness and woo with you? Because for far too long, I kept much of it hidden out of fear. Very rarely did I let anyone in on just how deeply weird I am, and how much that weirdness delights me. I don’t want to waste any more of my precious time on this earth hiding the weird shit that makes me a certain kind of awesome. I am and have always been and will always be a magickal, witchy woman. My abilities and practices are definitely too weird and out there for some people, and that’s okay because I’m not here to be everyone’s cup of tea. I am here in service to the Spiritual-But-Not-Religious, the Beautiful Weirdos, the Woo-Curious, the Unapologetically Unique among us. I see you, and I am here with you. Howl, Bitches!

middle aged blonde woman smiling

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The Third Pillar: Natural Harmony (Part 1- Connecting with Nature)

In my continuing exploration of the 4 Pillars of Transformational Positivity, we come to the 3rd Pillar- Natural Harmony.

Natural Harmony involves your relationship to the Natural World around you (earth, sky, animals, plants, elements etc.) and cultivating our connection to Nature.

Ask yourself: Where does your soul naturally feel most at home- at the beach, on a lake, hiking the mountains, walking in a forest, tending a flower or edible garden, or exploring the desert? What sorts of images from nature do you feel most drawn to? Do you love animals or feel any special connection to certain species? Does a starry sky on a clear night fill you with awe? Do you crave the feeling of your bare feet on soft grass, warm sand, or cool wet mud?

Transformational Positivity has taught me that I am not about being in The Hustle. I am not on this planet to constantly be grinding away at meaningless tasks of my own making (or anyone else’s). I’ve learned how to get everything done that I need to, with ease, and even a fair amount of joy, by tuning into the harmony of nature & managing my energy accordingly.

group of people standing on green grass field under blue sky
Photo by Anna Shvets on Pexels.com

When we distance ourselves more and more from the Natural World, we lose a deep and ancient connection to our very roots and the natural systems that sustain life. Creating more harmony between your being and the natural world might look like temporarily “unplugging” and escaping from your desk, your laptop, and your cellphone periodically for planned and/or spontaneous “Nature Breaks” in your nearest green space and reconnecting with the very real life happening around you.

While taking a week-long remote tropical island retreat might be on your dreamiest bucket list (just me?), creating more Natural Harmony in your life can be as simple as sitting outside quietly for as little as 5, 10, 15 minutes a day… or longer if you can manage it… and being mindful of how many different living things you encounter in that time. There is a natural, palpable stress relief that occurs in your body when you let yourself focus on the shapes of the clouds, or the scents on the wind, or the many different shades of green (or blue, or orange, for example) you observe in the plants and/or animals around you.

Some possible ideas to explore:

  • Stargazing, observing lunar cycles, sunbathing, living by seasonal rhythms
  • Studying planetary movements, astronomy, & astrology
  • Hiking, Tree hugging, Forest Bathing
  • Organic Gardening
  • Flower & Plant “worship” (observance & reverence of their pure beauty)
  • Natural/Herbal Medicine, Herbalism
  • Animal Connections (care, communication, conservation/advocacy), Vegetarianism/Veganism
  • Rocks & Crystals – energetic properties, vibrational healing
  • Studying the energy of Elements and how you relate to them: Earth, Air, Water, Fire

The patterns, variety, and perfect cycles found within the Natural world have been an endless source of awe, inspiration and rejuvenation since the dawn of time. Stay tuned for my next installment of this series where I begin to dig into some of the above mentioned practices and how I incorporate them into my life.

The Excavation

One of the lessons I am learning since my breast cancer diagnosis back in early March, and through my current chemotherapy treatments, is the value & necessity of deep introspection. It has been a time that has forced my overly active performance based perfectionist ass to SIT. DOWN. Rest. Face my Shit. Dive Deep, and then go deeper still, excavating layers and layers of hurt and suffering and fear, and offering those precious pains of the past on the altar of Love.

It’s in these spaces of intentional, ultra-focused awareness when I experience some of the treasures that I coveted & previously sought out in all the wrong ways; treasures like Peace, Calm, Contentment, Healing, Strength, Resilience, Love, and Joy.

Such are the treasures that I had tried to find through partying, hookups, addictions, religions, escapism, numbing, avoidance, deflection, discipline, overworking, and high-vibe-only mindset bullshit. All of these were just more ways to punish myself for my perceived failures.

I am doing much less coaching these days in favor of offering my tarot-based Spiritual Clarity Readings, which is work that feels so much more nourishing to me instead of draining. I have made enough space in my practice to allow for serving fewer clients, in order to say Yes to my own need for physical and emotional healing. I have built extra time between clients so that I am serving within my capacity, not beyond it. Even this simple step is the result of some deep digging, and was arrived at by picking apart some residual bits of guilt/shame.

I know that I have come a long way and I celebrate this. I’m grateful for the healing that has taken place, for the goodness that has come forward. I know that the Love, Joy, Calm, Peace, Strength, Resilience, and Contentment that I feel now is beautiful, and that there is still more of it all to welcome in. So I will sit down, and meditate, and learn new things, and unearth more of me to be Loved. This is Healing. This is Transformational/Positivity.

A ball of soft grey yarn slowly being made into a baby blanket for my niece.

Release, Reflect, and Restore.

For the past week, I took part in a small social experiment on Instagram and Facebook called #amplifymelanatedvoices and it has been powerfully eye-opening. The premise was to center, promote, and amplify the messages of Black activists and artists while simultaneously putting our own messages on pause and truly listening to what they have to say. Without the need to draw attention back to ourselves, our opinions, our perspectives, our excuses, our discomfort. Just… listen. And then, lift up.

Because the truth is that Black people in America have been telling us the same message, over and over, in every way imaginable for hundreds of years and by and large, it seems pretty evident that we haven’t really been listening.

As a long-time, dyed-in-the-wool social justice warrior, I thought that I had been listening, but I am seeing more and more clearly just how much I was only half-listening, and sometimes actively avoiding listening- deeply, reverently, listening– to the larger conversation around racial inequity and white supremacist culture. How often I was missing the message.

I’m in no way an expert in any of this. This is deeply personal work, and I know that I need the help, guidance, and leadership of the people who have been doing this a lot longer than me. Maybe you are someone who has been working at being an anti-racist for a while now, and maybe you are someone who is just starting to see, understand, and unpack what all of this means. Wherever you are personally in your own journey, know that there are people who are skilled and ready and willing to support your growth. I’ve included some links to resources below:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1BRlF2_zhNe86SGgHa6-VlBO-QgirITwCTugSfKie5Fs/mobilebasic

https://medium.com/equality-includes-you/what-white-people-can-do-for-racial-justice-f2d18b0e0234https://www.teenvogue.com/story/beyond-the-hashtag-how-to-take-anti-racist-action

The Adaway Group

4 Ways White People Can Process Their Emotions Without Hijacking the Conversation on Racial Justice

What to do next:

RELEASE– Let it allllll out! Spend some quality time with your therapist, your besties, your support squad, your spiritual teachers, and talk about what you’re feeling/experiencing. Name all the feelings and fears that come up to the surface. Release your messy inside stuff. Cry hard and ugly. Shout loudly. Do this with the people who you can trust to be supportive, who can hold space for you without judgement or shaming- NOT with hateful internet trolls (I’ve learned this one the hard way). Release expectations from yourself to do things perfectly, to get it “right” the first time, to have all the answers. Release the need to be right. Release the need for other people to do their work. What else can you release? What else do you need to let go of?

REFLECT– After you’ve had a minute to let your mess out, take the time to process it. Reflect on what it means to you/for you, or if there is any deeper meaning to be found. Note: there isn’t always a gold nugget hiding in a turd; sometimes a turd is just a turd. Reflect on what you want to have happen next, and what some of the steps are that you will need to take to move forward.

RESTORE- Take. Good. Care. Of. Yourself.  Restore your whole self with lots of rest, body care, nutrition, art, laughter, music, and so much Love. Restore the relationships that are most important and nourishing to you (this is not the time to feed the drain). Pray and meditate. Build up your community.

I am a teacher and a healer, and I am also here to listen and learn. I look forward to sharing more tips, wisdom, and love with you in the weeks to come. Stay tuned, and stay strong. I am in this with you!

Work with me! Schedule a free consultation call: Reach out today and get on my calendar. >>Click here to schedule a free consultation call with me<< and let’s do some Transformational Positivity work together. I offer insightful Spiritual Clarity Readings using the tarot, powerful and subtle Energy Healing, deeply reflective Soul-Mirroring Sessions for you, and Animal Energy Sessions for your pet.

BEING THE CHANGE THAT WE WANT TO SEE IN THE WORLD REQUIRES MAKING A PHENOMENAL MESS.


This week has been exceptionally messy, both for me personally in my healing from cancer journey, and in the much larger context of people absolutely fucking fed up with the cancer of continued mistreatment of our Black brothers and sisters in this country due to our inherently racist, white-supremacist systems of government, law enforcement, judiciary, and all the exceptional privileges that come with being born in a white-skinned body. Fed up with not being heard.

Still with me? Cool. Let’s go a little further.

I have taken my DNA test. I know that my genetic makeup is primarily Northern European, (48.5%) and the balance of my ancestry is Southern European (32.7%) with a smattering of Ashkenazi Jewish (.4%) Native American (5.8%) East Asian (.8%) and Sub-Saharan African (3.2%). The remaining 8.6% is scattered to the winds in traces and indistinguishable bits. Possibly alien, star-seed, angelic, or prehistoric. But if you didn’t know any of this, you’d look at me and just see another basic White person. Previously with gorgeous long platinum blonde hair, now with a shiny bald dome.

Before Cancer
Chemo is fucking rough, but necessary if I want to free my body from this cancer.



I don’t have to fear most of the places I visit or the daily activities I engage in because of the color of my skin. And if you are another basic White person like me, you don’t either. That’s the rule. That’s how this shit works. We know this, deep in our bones, even when we aren’t ready to admit it. Even when we can’t stomach what the truth of that means. Even when we wish and hope and pray that it just isn’t so, that we are the exception, that we really are GOOD, that we aren’t actually racist, that we “don’t see color” or that we are doing our work. We know.

AND… what if we want to do better? What if we want to see real change happen, and we want to see it happen in our lifetime? What if we are ready to face our millions of excuses head on? What if we are willing to focus on the Black people who are victims of our violence and our apathy? What if we are willing to be uncomfortable and ready to start GETTING MESSY and unpacking our culturally and familially ingrained biases, unearth our own seen and unseen racism, and actually create positive change? What if we are willing to put our ideals into action?

What if?

Healing from cancer is MESSY. The treatments, the recovery, are brutal and messy. I hope that you NEVER have to deal with it yourself, or watch someone you love go through it. If you have walked this road yourself, you know. I see you, and I love you.

Healing from racism is no less messy. The biggest difference is that every White person in the US has been infected with racism- think of it as a spectrum in which every damn one of us falls on, from ignorant & fragile to full-on White Supremacist. Some are completely poisoned and proudly rotting, while others aren’t even aware that they have been affected and go about their merry way, oblivious to the damage they are doing. Still others are painfully aware of their white privilege and are consciously doing the hard, messy, necessary work day after day.

It will be messy. It will be difficult. It will be awkward. It will be uncomfortable. It will be risky. We will make mistakes. Like, LOTS of mistakes. And, if we are willing to do this important and messy and necessary work within ourselves and within our families and within our schools and within our houses of worship and within our workplaces and within our communities and within our online spaces and within our law enforcement agencies and within our local and state and federal governments, if we are willing to make a phenomenal mess of the status quo- THEN we will begin to see the world change and become the beautiful, equitable-for-all utopia that we say we want it to be.

What to do next:

Take ONE action step towards becoming a person who is anti-racist. Then, take another. Repeat.

Here are some links to helpful resources that you can begin to use right away:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1BRlF2_zhNe86SGgHa6-VlBO-QgirITwCTugSfKie5Fs/mobilebasic

https://thebodyisnotanapology.com/magazine/4-ways-white-people-can-process-their-emotions-without-bringing-the-white-tears/

https://adawaygroup.com/

https://medium.com/equality-includes-you/what-white-people-can-do-for-racial-justice-f2d18b0e0234

https://www.teenvogue.com/story/beyond-the-hashtag-how-to-take-anti-racist-action



Thank you for reading and allowing yourself to be uncomfortable with this conversation. Thank you for being willing to face and unpack your unpleasant parts. Thank you for making the choice every day moving forward to do the hard, messy, necessary work of dismantling racism and the systems that uphold it. You’re not alone; I’m in it with you.

New Moon, New Beginnings

Whew! Well Loves, this has been an interesting month, hey?

We’re entering the New Moon phase, which is all about rest, introspection, and new beginnings. It has me wondering:

•What does Rest look like for you right now?

What have you been learning about yourself in the past month?

What new beginnings are you preparing for?

I’ll start:
REST for me has been very much about allowing my body to recover from the first round of chemo. It’s looked like saying “No” or “Not Now” to everything that I can, instead of my usual recovering Type A habit of pushing myself through to the point of collapse. (Hello, that’s not healthy in any circumstance!)

INTROSPECTION has been teaching me some pretty cool things about myself. Qualities like resilience, courage, strength, joyfullness, creativity, and wisdom that I have tended to overlook or diminish for fear of “what people might think” because let’s be honest- being judged sucks, and… it’s going to happen anyway so you might as well be true to yourself.

NEW BEGINNINGS well hot damn, as corny and cheesy as it may sound every day really is a gift. I am grateful for each new day that I wake up alive in this body, and- I still sometimes have to remind myself this throughout the day. Today, for example, if things had gone to plan I would be in Australia for the start of an epic, around-the-world honeymoon with my gorgeous husband. Instead, I am writing from our dining room table for a change of scenery. It’s not quite the same! 😂 And, it’s still pretty fucking great.

Okay, your turn! Tell me what’s what in your world today. I miss you.

💖🙏🦋

Today instead of starting our around the world honeymoon in Sydney, Australia- I’m bald and writing from our dining room table in Southern California.
Saturday was my wedding day! The day that my hair began falling out by the handful from chemo. Barely enough to hold my veil in place!

The Second Pillar: Serving With Joy (Part 3 – Finding Joy in Your Soul’s Purpose)

In my understanding of The 4 Pillars of Transformational Positivity, the First Pillar is Whole-Self Love, which is about understanding & healing our connection to the Self. This is tremendously important in its own right, and it is essential to do the work of Whole-Self Love for us to move forward successfully to the Second Pillar: Serving With Joy, which is all about our connection with community. (You can read about The First Pillar here if you missed it)

In this third part of the current series, we wrap up our look at the Second Pillar by understanding why serving with joy is directly tied to our connection with community. I believe that it is within the space of COMMUNITY that we learn how to best SERVE in our highest capacity and find true JOY in our soul’s purpose. (Please click here to read if you missed Part 1 or Part 2 of this series.)

Your Soul’s Purpose

Serving humanity from a place of deep Joy starts within your chosen community (online, in person, geographic neighborhood, professional, or common interest). You have a very special, unique, one-of-a-kind gift to share, one that can never be duplicated and one that only you can offer. That gift is You. You! Your story. Your passions. Your experiences. Your perspective. Your wisdom. Your voice. Your talents & hobbies. Your art. Your curiosity. Your discoveries. Your healing. Your peace. Your Past, Present, & Future. All of what makes up your personal journey, your own unique expression of Divinity in the flesh, is the whole point of coming to Earth and experiencing life as a human. Discovering, embracing, celebrating and sharing what makes you uniquely You- that IS your soul’s purpose. And the most beautiful thing? Once you realize that this precious, perfectly imperfect, one-of-a-kind life of yours IS your gift, you can stop wasting so much time and energy on the shit that doesn’t interest you and start connecting with your passion, your joy, your slice of heaven on earth and serving your community with it.

So, What Are You Passionate About?

Spending any amount of your time engaged in things that you are passionate about creates a wonderful sense of fulfillment and a layer of Joy to your life. But what if you’ve never had the time or opportunity to explore things that interest you, let alone spark the deep burning fire of passion?

If you’ve been feeling stuck for a long time and just can’t even begin to think about what you are passionate about, here are 3 of my favorite questions to jump-start your thoughts and maybe even rekindle a fire inside you. Take some time to journal on one or all of these prompts:

  • Name 3 highlight experiences in your life. What do they have in
    common? What does this tell you about yourself?
  • What did you dream about doing when you were a child? How does it feel to imagine yourself doing that now?
  • What are you most curious about right now?

That third question is probably my favorite because it takes the pressure off what can feel like the overwhelming “bigness” of trying to discover your passion. Especially true if you’re feeling depressed or find yourself using not knowing what you’re passionate about as a way to beat yourself up. Curiosity becomes a lifeline, a rope to pull you up, a trail of breadcrumbs to follow into a brighter, more hopeful frame of mind. Curiosity can lead you on a life-long path of discovery that will help you reveal more and more of what makes you so unique, what makes you the most happy, a path that opens up new friendships, support systems, and joyful connections to community.

If you recall from Part 2 of this series, I invited you to determine where the gaps are in your community. Now that you’ve started to explore the things that bring you the most Joy, ask yourself: Is this thing that I enjoy or am passionate about something that can help to serve my community? If the answer is Yes, then you are holding the missing puzzle piece. Bring your passions & interests forward and present them, filling in the gap in a way that only you can fill it. You may just look up and see a grateful new community unfolding around you.

The Second Pillar: Serving With Joy (Part 1- Connecting In Community)

The 2nd Pillar of Transformational Positivity is Serving With Joy, which is about how we find connection within community. Let’s start by taking a quick look at what “community” actually means beyond simply being a group of people. There are 4 basic types to consider:

  • Common Interest: Communities of people who share the same recreational interest or passion.
  • Action Based: Communities of people trying to bring about change.
  • Place/Circumstance: Communities of people brought together by geographic boundaries.
  • Professional/Practicing: Communities of people in the same profession.

These 4 basic categories are not mutually exclusive, and there can be overlap (Common Interest + Place/Circumstance, or Practicing + Action Based + Place/Circumstance, for example). You might find yourself in one or more of these communities at the same time, and it’s entirely possible that you’ll run into a few of the same people in some of the other circles that you frequent.

A Closer Look at Your Connections

The Second Pillar: SERVING WITH JOY [Key Area = Connection to Community] Which communities do you most identify with? What are some of the various roles you have played or are currently playing in your different communities? What do you need in order to feel like you are seen, heard, and a valued part of your community? How are you contributing? How are you receiving? Where are you serving with the most Joy?

“Community” includes all of the other humans we interact with outside of ourselves. Some of these relationships are knit closer to us than others- family, friends, neighbors, coworkers, colleagues. While other relationship threads are going to be much thinner and stretched over a greater distance, it is important to recognize that in the most basic sense we are all connected in some way. If we can understand that the First Pillar is about Who We Are, then we can recognize that the Second Pillar is about Why We Are Here.

  • Whenever clients come to me looking for guidance in this area, it’s typically because they are struggling to find meaningful ways to connect their “Why” in ways that feel in alignment with Who they are and the people in their communities. They feel unfulfilled because their is no reciprocal Joy that they are experiencing. I help them to look for opportunities that they may be missing, shifts in mindset, perspective, and/or actions that they can take to create more positive connections in their various communities.

Desire to belong to a community of our choosing is a natural part of our identity. As people, we are inherently social beings and are hard-wired for human connection, a part of our development as a species that dates back to prehistoric times and served as a marker for safety and survival. In modern times, even the most introverted people and rugged individuals still need some form of healthy human interaction, even if their community is just 1 other person.

The communities we belong to can serve to provide a sense of belonging, safety, normalcy, education, support, inspiration, camaraderie, entertainment, joy, healing, purpose, personal growth & positive transformation. These are all important aspects of our human experience that we actively seek out, share, and receive through participating in community.

Think about and make a list of the different communities you currently belong to (include in person and online groups, common interest groups, action based groups, geographic groups, professional groups, etc.). Ask Yourself:

  • How do I fit in to each space?
  • What are my roles in each space?
  • What are some of the ways that I contribute and serve in each space?
  • Are there any gifts, talents, ideas, strengths, or other resources that I can offer to better serve my community/ies?
  • Is there anything that I need that I am NOT getting from my community/ies?

Now, take a closer look at your answers to the above questions. Do you notice any gaps? Do any of your answers elicit an emotional or physical response in your body? Write them down, this is valuable information for you moving forward.

To discuss your answers with me privately and work on solutions, reach out to schedule a 1:1 coaching session.

Next Week: Tips for Bridging the Gaps in Your Community

Transformational Positivity for Shitty Days

A 3-Step Energy Releasing Practice for Your Self-Care

We all experience ups and downs in our personal energy, and we all have moments when we are feeling anything but “high vibe” and positive. Congratulations on being a human! One of my very favorite things about Transformational Positivity is that you will never be shamed for being a human, having emotions, or expressing difficult feelings. You will never be told by me to just fake-it-til-you-make-it. I don’t do spiritual bypassing around here.

I will never teach you to ignore any of the challenging things that you are feeling, carrying, or stuck in. You don’t have to pretend that everything is perfect all of the time, or force yourself to smile and look at the bright side only. Instead, my offering for you today is a simple energy releasing practice to use whenever you are bogged down with hard, heavy feelings and need to make some damn sense of it all. Basically, it’s Transformational Positivity for Shitty Days.

This is a simple 3-step technique I use whenever I need to get unstuck from my wallow:

1• UNAPOLOGETIC FEELINGS DUMP. Set a timer for 3- 5 minutes. Write or Say out loud whatever things you are feeling right now. Don’t censor yourself. It’s powerful & important to acknowledge the so-called negative thoughts, fears and hard feelings in order to learn from them, move through them, & release them. Even if you don’t magically find all the answers right away, the simple action of acknowledging your very real emotions can be enough to move the needle from completely immobilized to okay, there’s maybe possibly some hope here. Also, it’s a good reminder that you are not a robot and are allowed to have a shitty day.

2• I LIKE TO MOVE IT MOVE IT. Set a timer for 3- 5 minutes. Move your body as you are able to (dance, stretch, shake it out, clap your hands, walk, climb your stairs, roll your chair around, whatever) It’s okay to make some noise! Bang on a drum, clang some pans, ring some bells. Sing, shout, whistle, laugh, cry, hum, yodel, whatever. The motions created by your movement and the vibrations of the noise you make physically dispels stagnant energy.

3• BREATHE & BRUSH. Set a timer for 3- 5 minutes. Come back to your breath. Sit and take slow, deep, full breaths, noticing any areas of tension in your body (jaw, neck, shoulders, back, hips, etc). Send loving thoughts to the areas of your body that are carrying your hard feelings. Consciously relax tense areas. Massage or gently touch your temples, forehead, neck, shoulders, arms, hands, chest, belly, hips, legs, feet. Use your hands to “brush” your aura, which is the energetic space just outside of your physical body. You can do this with empty hands, or while holding your favorite crystals, a feather, leaf, or flower.

the blessings butterfly, mantra, prayer

Have you tried this 3-step method? Drop a comment and let me know how it went for you.

To learn some more Transformational Positivity techniques, take my online course How to Cultivate Positivity with 4 Simple Tools.

Self Care for Whole-Self Love

For the month of March, I will be continuing my exploration of Whole-Self Love with a particular focus on the importance of Self Care. I will be sharing some of my own rituals, as well as those from some of my favorite folx around the world. Enjoy!

What does ‘Self Care’ mean to you? Does it conjure up images of a spoiled princess or celebrity whose every whim is being attended to by her groveling personal staff? Do you tend to write it off as something decadent, frivolous and/or unrealistic for you? I know that if you’re anything like me, chances are that you’ve spent a lot of your life resisting or flat out rejecting the idea of Self-Care as being something for you to indulge in while simultaneously labeling it as SELFISH, and therefore, BAD. This, my friend, is the first step: recognizing that Self-Care is not a bad thing. In fact, it is a good and necessary thing that every adult deserves to experience for optimum health. Truly, it’s about providing the care that your body, mind, soul and spirit need to support you throughout your time here on the planet.

GOOD NEWS: Creating a personal self-care practice that feels lush, supportive, and satisfying is not as hard to do as you might think. It doesn’t have to break the bank, either! It’s helpful to remind ourselves that Self-Care does not necessitate Luxury. Self-Care is so much more than 24k Gold facials, Champagne bubble baths, or having a private masseuse on call 24/7 (although that would be the kind of luxurious amenities that I could learn to get used to). Luxury items and experiences are wonderful, and if you can have the privilege of access to them then please do so with total enjoyment; but if you aren’t a princess or a celebrity or a millionaire don’t fall for the mistaken thinking that it’s got to be all-or-nothing. Self-Care isn’t selfish, and it’s not just for the super-rich.

Tip of the Week: Build on the Basics

START WHERE YOU ARE: When you are trying to figure out what a regular Self-Care practice can look like for you, begin with finding your baseline then build from there. By simply taking some time to examine what you are currently doing, it’s easy to map out a cultivated routine that suits you.

We all have some basic maintenance requirements for these fabulous human bodies that we live in which include food, water, sleep, and shelter. These are non-negotiable for our survival. We must recognize that each of these 4 areas can be enhanced to build a practice of Self-Care. Additionally, you may have a body that is able to include movement as part of its daily experience, and you may also be in a position to enjoy access to clothing, bathing, community, education, and healthcare. All of these have the potential to be developed into something that enriches and supports you physically, spiritually, mentally and emotionally for a holistic approach to Self-Care.

Loving and caring for our physical body starts with basic maintenance and expands to suit our individual preferences and abilities. Food and Water becomes an adventure in nourishment. Sleep and Shelter becomes a commitment to daily restoration. Movement becomes stretching, strengthening, challenging, and exploring what your body can do. Bathing and Clothing evolve into personal grooming, tending, pleasuring, delighting, adorning, and expressing. Community, Education, and Healthcare turn into opportunities for including, accepting, embracing, expanding, soothing, and healing. Can you see the difference? Does this open your mind to new possibilities?

 Food for Thought

Self-Care that makes sense will be tailored to YOU. It will take into account your individual needs and wants, it will fit into your current lifestyle and it will adapt accordingly as your life and your body change. Some questions to reflect on:

  1. How do you currently care for the body that you live in?
  2. Which of the 4 basic maintenance areas (food, water, sleep, and shelter) can you improve for your Self-Care? If there is more than one, list them in the order of which you would like to work on first.
  3. Which of the 6 additional areas (movement, bathing, clothing, community, education, healthcare) can you build on for your Self-Care? If there is more than one, list them in the order of which you would like to work on first.

It takes courage to get to know yourself, so Bravo! I see you and I salute you as you take these positive steps towards Transformation. PLEASE do not be tempted to use your answers to these questions to heap shame on yourself. You are not a bad person, you are not “doing it wrong” or failing at life. Instead, use your answers as information to help you make new choices moving forward.

If you have questions about how to take some next steps in creating your own Self-Care routine and rituals, why don’t you go ahead and schedule a free consultation call with me? I would love to have a quick chat with you. Click on the “Schedule” button at the top of this page today to set up a no-obligation call or video conference with me.